I am the daughter they stole by Eileen Cummings with Jana Anvari and Claire Smith

Eileen was only 4 years old when she was stolen from her mother on Mainoru Station in Arnhem Land, and taken to Croker Island Mission, north of Darwin. She is a member of the Stolen Generations, one of the many Aboriginal children removed from their parents under Australia’s assimilation policies from 1910 to 1970.

The little ones crying for their mothers were comforted by eight-year-old Lorky, another Aboriginal girl, who reminded them of their language, their people, and their ceremonies. She would tell them ‘One day we go home’. Eileen thinks she could not have survived without Lorky. The children accepted the arduous chores set them as just part of life on the mission. Worst were the laundry duties involving digging long poles into the boiling hot suds to lift out heavy sheets and turning them into the cold water. There were happy times on Croker Island, the groups of children running and playing in the trees in their free time, seeking out goose eggs, wild apples and cockles. But whilst there was the companionship of the other children, nothing could compensate for the feeling of loss, and lack of love.

Eileen Cummings describes the heart-breaking moment when as an adult she was reunited with her mother, the tears streaming down her mother’s face, the distance created by the loss of language, and the strangeness of a grown woman returning instead of the cherished child. Another devastating moment is later in life, when Eileen’s daughter in turn says ‘Mum, whenever we ran to you for a hug, when we were children, you would flinch’. This is the damage caused by growing up without love: how could the stolen generations know how to show love to their children, with no role models, no experience. Many succumbed to alcohol and violence, a long-lasting intergenerational trauma.

Eileen was determined to survive, and she took advantage of any opportunity for learning and further education. She carved out a career as teacher and public servant, and became an advisor to four chief ministers. She became the lead plaintiff in the landmark Northern Territory Stolen Generations Class Action. Her book is a moving personal account of loss and grief, survival and resilience. It reveals a terrible time in Australia’s history that has ongoing repercussions today.

Themes: Stolen generations, Aboriginal women, Missions, Loss, Grief, Intergenerational trauma.

Helen Eddy